Cadence

I've been addicted to old time radio broadcasts lately and been ingesting mass quantities of "Suspense", "X-1", "Inner Sanctum" and the rest.

The delivery is cheesy and the transcriptions are over the top but they help paint the mental picture. What I find intriguing about them is the vocal delivery, inflection and their timing. Think about the limitations of playing out a story without visuals accompanying you.

What I find most interesting is the use of cadence (the pregnant pause) in their delivery to make a point. It's something that's sorely lacking nowadays. Think about the most effective politicians and pitch men out there. Part of the delivery is the pause.

Something to munch on....

10 Worst Super Bowl Ads Ever

Somehow, they excluded the Whopperettes.

Go check them out and see what you think.

The 10 worst Super Bowl ads of all time

Is a channel an experience?

The NFL network keeps telling me that I missed some great games. Maybe, but not enough to want to pay the theives at Time Warner even more money for the ability to watch programming that is still loaded with commercials.

Isn't it arrogant to believe that cable operators are going to bend over and grab both ankles because the fans will unite behind the NFL Network. (Court TV has started doing this as well. Appealing to the end users in an effort to get them to call the Dish Network and demand that Court TV be put back into the rotation).

Does anyone care if we watch the game on ABC, CBS, NBC, ESPN or NFL Network. We just wanna watch the game, right?

Is a channel an experience?

I look forward to seeing what happens.

There's a time to sell and a time to shut up....

ATT Sucks. The cost for my DSL had been bouncing from month to month. A couple of months ago it just about doubled. So I called, sat on hold and and chose a plan which was priced at $24. I got my next bill and they charged me $39.

So I call again, tell my story and the rep is like "okay, it'll be set at your new rate. It takes up to 2 months to get your new rate in place."

This is bullshit.

It's going to take up to 2 months for my new pricing to take effect in their system?

They are charging different pricing for the exact same service?

And they cranked us in December. Nice year end share boost move.

This SCREAMS class action lawsuit which means that some law firm is going to make a bundle and I'm going to get a settlement check for like 34 cents.

So I told her I wanted her a credit based on my previous phone call. I'm hold for another couple of minutes. And she comes back and starts reading from her script and congratulates me because she can credit me back the money they overcharged me.

And this is where it gets good:

She asks me if I'm satisfied with her service (her resolution of my problem). How do I respond to that?

Thank you for telling me that you'll return the money you're stealing from me after I caught you.....twice?

Then she tried to sell me satellite tv. 3 times.

I thank her politely and say know I just don't think so.

...and she's just reciting from her script - clearly - some knob in marketing came up with this concept.

Finally, after the 3rd no, she's like "Sir - you realize you get a better price with us, right?"

And I was so disappointed with them screwing up my make-good client experience that I actually told her (I lied) that I was happy with Time Warner and hung up on her.

TW sucks about as badly as ATT but that is another story.

Time Warner just took over Adephia in our area and they?'ve recently been running these abrasive "you better not steal cable or we're going to get you" kind of campaign.

Good will be damned.

There is a time to sell and a time to shut up. There's a lesson in this, it isn't just bitching. AT&T pissed me off over a sneaky $15 rate jack. I don't know how I feel (or really felt) about AT&T. They were just another phone company...but with all things equal, making a switch when the time comes will be a whole lot easier. I feel worse towards AT&T than I do anyone else out there (who's left? hahaha).

Nobody wants to leave money on the table but don't grub for quarters at your customers' expense because your good deeds will be forgotten long before your questionable ones.

Loyalty Rewards Program

I joined a points program (as a provider) back in November which I thought was pretty cool. It works along the same principles as credit card points where you can redeem points for everything from tropical vacations to tools. One guy is even working at redeeming his for a car (so I hear).

Basically it amounts to 3% back to the client for using me and paying their bills on time.

The cost of entry was kinda steep - almost a grand but here's the rub - and I had this conversation with another vendor.

What's it cost you to obtain a new client? How do you measure that? Simple math (if you want to get simple about it). What did you spend last year on advertising and marketing? How many new clients did you get? What was each client worth to you?

I got 7 meetings and 3 new clients. I'll take that any day of the week.

I'm surprised more industries don't do this.

The Dumb Tagline of the Year Award

It comes from the people that brought you DEP gel, Duck Tape, Coast, Purex and other fine products.

We present this find slogan: "A brand like a friend".

Which Google spits out as "eine Marke mögen einen Freund."

This gem is courtesy of Henkel. Maybe it made more sense in Germam...is Henkel a German company? Ohhh those whily Germans.

Henkel is my friend...aren't they yours?